my mom is trying to pick a colour for her new wheelchair and me and my dad are telling her to get black and she’s just like “but how will I know if someone is stealing it” and my dad is just like “because you’ll be sitting on the floor” and she slapped him
*hides good snacks from family members*
there’s a word for that
People are insane on this product review of a banana slicer
oh my fucking god
OH MY GOD I REBLOGGED THIS BEFORE I READ THE COMMENTS AND
I CAN’T BREATHE
“I tried the banana slicer and found it unacceptable. As shown in the picture, the slices is curved from left to right. All of my bananas are bent the other way.”
when my mom was pregnant she would put a walkman up to her stomach and play cher’s greatest hits and she apologizes for it every day because she thinks that’s what made me gay
summer is real cute until every fuckin type of insect comes out of the 8th circle of hell
Jack Dawson… Penniless artist who wins a ticket onto Titanic in 1912, attends a first class dinner, develops a taste for the finer things in life, pockets the Heart of the Ocean, survives the sinking, pawns the diamond, spends the following ten years building his wealth and in 1922 moves to West Egg as Jay Gatsby… Millionaire with a shady past and fear of swimming pools.
IT ALL MAKES SENSE.
Then Inception happens
Cheating on anyone is deeper than people realize, it destroys their outlook on love, their future relationships, and peace within themselves.
reminder that pink floyd have stated that they never intended to make “stoner music” and are uncomfortable with being thought of as a stoner band